a lengthy engagement story; be not quick to judge.

this being the longest day of my up-to-this-point life,
i want to relive a story about when nick and i were engaged: the now second longest day of my life.
ahem.
it was a cold day, probably february.
i can't remember {though i should if only for posterity's sake.}
i had just gotten off a really long and trying shift at Dickey's {they made me stay late, mind you. i was upset.}
then i wandered around with a phone awkwardly glued to my ear while driving a stick shift while i shouted at my mother trying to give me directions to this place i was late to.
i eventually ended up where i needed to be 45 minutes earlier;
nick and i designed our wedding invations with these lovely people.
i was already tired, hungry, and suffereing from what was on the edge of a migraine.
afterwards, {and against all my right-mindedness} we went to ikea.
oh how i hated everything in that store and glared at every pillow and bed sheet.
{it was days like this where i didn't care if i was married in my jeans and nobody came.}
now, you have to understand that i was an emotional wreck:
birth control {oh how i hate that stuff} plus a relatively hard job where they overworked me,
plus wedding stuff, plus the stress of like everything on the planet,
plus it was awful weather and i just hated being engaged-- i wanted marriage!
also, earlier that week nick's mom had taken my ring back to cedar city
so the missing diamond could be replaced before the wedding.
so. i wasn't exactly a pot of flowers.
we walked {i stomped} out of ikea
and thought it proper that we drive to wal mart so he could buy me a temporary replacement ring so i didn't feel so naked and available.
we tried finding a nearby store, but to no avail.
we got lost somewhere in draper and called it quits.
by this time the weather had gotten so bad that my mother told me that i couldn't come home that night.
i started bawling because of who knows why.
i pleaded for her to let me go so i could take a shower and sleep in my own bed,
but nick was given strict orders not to let me drive home and to take me back with him.
so i gave up. i sat in that truck throwing flames at him through my eyes and bawling the entire time.
we got to his apartment and he gave me my space.
i pulled on some of his pajamas,
demanded that he gave me his softest, warmest blanket
fixed me two bags of top ramen
and ate it while glaring at the TV.
i fell asleep crying on the foam pads nick was using as a bed {did you know that he didn't have a bed until we got ours 2 days before the wedding?}
and he oh so softly slipped his arm around my waist.
and, you know,
everything was okay.
i liked having him next to me, despite my prior knowledge that i conquered all on my own.
{and, trust me, we didn't do anything naughty.}
and for some strange reason i have yet to find,
he liked sleeping next to me too even when i didn't want anything to do with him.
and such is the story of my life.
i get to the edge where i seem to be doing everything wrong and everything is wrong in return,
but something my sweet husband does for me brings me back and everything makes sense.
being engaged sucks; being married rules.
and.. the end.